Kalonzo Musyoka was politically introduced to the people of Kitui North in 1983. His political parent and mentor, Maluki Kitili Mwendwa, wanted the freshly minted University of Nairobi lawyer to deal with the then Kitui North MP Phillip Musyoka Manandu.
For starters, Manandu was Kalonzo’s uncle. But blood relations count for nothing in politics. And so the two Tseikuru sons found themselves in the 1983 snap election ballot alongside then COTU boss Mulei Vele. Manandu won the election, Kalonzo a distant third.
As fate would have it, Manandu was assassinated two years later by his bodyguard—ostensibly on instructions whose issuer has never been known. Kalonzo easily won the 1985 by-election to represent Kitui North (present-day Kitui West, Mwingi West, Mwingi Central and Mwingi North).
Once in Nairobi, the single, handsome, eloquent legislator caught the eye of then President Moi through the lenses of Kamba kingmaker Joseph Mulu Mutisya.
Within three years, Kalonzo was appointed Assistant Minister, Deputy Speaker during the transition to multiparty politics, and later Cabinet Minister for Foreign Affairs. Then Kenya realised that Kalonzo was presidential material. This triggered a political war of attrition between Muvisi (as he is affectionately known for finishing off Mulei Vele in 1985) and political giants.
KANU bigwigs suddenly realised that Kalonzo was a threat to replace Moi upon retirement. Prof. George Saitoti and his backers Nicholas Biwott, Simeon Nyachae and his protégé David Musila, Mwai Kibaki and Kyale Mwendwa launched underground movements to destabilise Kalonzo.
They almost succeeded on March 20th, 2002. Kalonzo, Saitoti and Kamotho were to be kicked out of KANU to accommodate Uhuru Kenyatta and Raila Odinga. Moi, in his wisdom or lack of it, wanted Uhuru to succeed him with Raila as his deputy. Political neophytes convinced Moi that Kalonzo should be cast aside and replaced by Joseph Nyagah.
Until Mulu Mutisya struck. On the evening of March 19th, Mulu, then partially blind, forced his way to State House and pleaded with Moi to accept Kalonzo as one of the four Vice Chairmen. Moi immediately summoned Hosea Kiplagat and William Ruto. He instructed them to visit the Athi River Hotel where Eastern Kenya delegates were assembled and communicate the new development. The Athi River Hotel, from where Kalonzo’s fortunes were turned, was owned by Titus Kasuve, former KFF Secretary General.
That settled, realpolitik in readiness for Moi’s exit began in earnest. Kalonzo smelt political blood and teamed up with Raila, Saitoti and Kamotho to defeat Uhuru in the 2002 elections. The decision to abandon Moi’s protégé for Kibaki after so many political favours shocked even Kalonzo’s worst critics.
To sink the message home, Kalonzo went to his native Mwingi town and witnessed as a big live cock (KANU) was buried alive—a ritual signalling the end of his relationship with Moi, Uhuru and KANU.
Kalonzo has since then never worked with Uhuru, Gideon Moi or President Ruto despite fleeting fake and pretentious meetings.
Then the first political blunder (or is it Raila juju?) happened. Kalonzo joined Raila’s LDP without a clear plan other than to defeat Uhuru. No sooner had the LDP coalition with Kibaki won the election, than the two were dumped from government.
Kibaki, having crossed River Chania, recoiled back to his golf buddies and retained only Professor Saitoti, mainly due to his Kikuyu roots.
Kalonzo, like a bitter ex-lover, Raila and William Ruto formed the Orange Movement after 2005. But inexplicably, Kalonzo abandoned this group and formed ODM Kenya, through which he ran for presidency in 2007. His bitter critics say that had Kalonzo backed Raila or Kibaki in 2007, the Post Election Violence would have been avoided.
Kalonzo diehards are categorical that had Raila and ODM backed him, Kibaki would have been a one-term president. ODM brigade still hold that they sent Kibaki home, but were robbed by Samuel Kivuitu and the deep state.
Between 2002 and 2022, Kalonzo and Raila have worked together for three and a half political cycles. Kalonzo’s last political bullet or yiangi is 2027—the moment he will either win the political crown or stare at his bright past.
To win the presidency, Kalonzo is betting on the support of DCP leader (read GEMA) Rigathi Gachagua. Muvisi is also drooling for the Western Kenya vote via Eugene Wamalwa, Mukhisa Kituyi or the wildcat Trans Nzoia Governor George Natembeya.
He hopes that his chemistry with his Kisii cousins will count this time. He speaks regularly with Chief Justice David Maraga and enjoys a pretentious relationship with the increasingly powerful Omugusii son, Dr. Fred Matiang’i.
Then there is the fragile relationship with retired President Uhuru. In 2002, Uhuru pleaded with Kalonzo to help him defeat Kibaki. Kalonzo refused flatly and went on to humiliate the future president.
As Kibaki’s Vice President, Kalonzo again worked with Uhuru, then the Finance Minister—not as friends but uneasy acquaintances eyeing the presidency after Kibaki.
Then the ICC came. Uhuru and William Ruto were primed as key PEV suspects—with these out of the way, Kalonzo saw a chance. Either out of malice, stupidity or grave political blunder, a political rally in Machakos was turned into a forum to ridicule Uhuru and Ruto over their impending lengthy jail terms by the ICC.
Johnstone Muthama, in his poetic best, told the large grounds that Uhuru and Ruto would not be in the 2013 ballot because they would be in jail. Among the listeners was Mr. Fred Muteti, a Ruto mole. Muteti met Ruto and Uhuru at Athi River, replayed the clip. You can guess the reaction.
Before the reckless Muthama comments, Uhuruto had met and offered Kalonzo the position of Speaker in exchange for their support. The die was cast. They settled for Ngilu—the rest is history.
Should Riggy G, who himself eyes the presidency, back Kalonzo, the Wiper boss will give President Ruto a run for his money. This is a hypothesis the president is well aware of. It is the reason Raila Odinga and ODM are in deep love with UDA and the president. No signs of infidelity have been discerned in the relationship.
Talk is rife that President Ruto is talking to Kalonzo about a possible running mate candidate. This will be a win-win situation for both. A Kalonzo–Raila–Ruto team is hard to beat.
DCP and Gachagua, on its own, have penetrated Ukambani, Kalonzo’s political bastion.
